In my last post, I discussed that genuine joy/happiness come from within. To continue from there, every one has his own definition of ‘happiness’. And it isn’t always about driving the hottest Formula 1 car, nor getting the employee of the year award, earning the highest 13th month pay, or beating the sales quota. Sometimes, the most sought after prizes in life doesn’t always go to the fastest, the strongest, the bravest or no even not even the best.
So how do you become genuinely happy? Happiness for a writer may mean launching as much best selling books as possible. Happiness for a basketball rookie may mean getting the rookie of the year award. Happiness for a beggar may mean a lot of money. Happiness for a business man may mean success.
So, really now, how do we become genuinely happy? Simple. You don’t have to have the best things in this world. It’s about doing and making the best out of every single thing. When you find yourself smiling at your own mistake and telling your self “Oh, I’ll do better next time”, you carry with you a flame of strong will power to persevere that may spread out like a brush fire. You possess a willingness to stand up again and try – that will make you a genuinely happy person.
When you learn to accept yourself and your own faults. You pass step 1 in the project “how to become genuinely happy”. For as long as you know how to accept others, you will also be accepted. For as long as you love and know how to love, you will receive love ten folds back.
Again, throw me that same question “how to become genuinely happy?” I’ll refer you to a friend of mine who strongly quoted- “Most of us know that laughter is the best medicine to life’s aches and pain. But most of us don’t know that the best kind of laughter is laughter over self. Coz then you don’t just become happy… you become free.” (Proverbs 15: 13 & 17: 22)
Friday, November 30, 2007
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Genuine Joy/Happiness Comes from Within 1
Life isn’t the sweetest candy. Sometimes, I feel like the world is just too heavy, but then I look around and find people who have continued to live fascinating and wonderful lives. And then I ask myself – “How did their life become so adorably sweet? How come they still can manage to laugh and play around despite a busy and sometimes stressful life?” Then I paused and pondered for awhile… I figured out that maybe, they started to work on a place called ‘SELF’.
So, how does one become genuinely happy? Step 1 is to love yourself.
My theology professor once said that “loving means accepting.” To love oneself means, not only to accept that you are not a perfect being, but that in that imperfection lies some God-given abilities to make something good out of your life.
However, loving yourself and discovering those abilities are not always possible without a heartfelt relationship with Jesus. He made you, He knows you best and He put all those abilities in you in the first place. Who better to make you love yourself than the One that made you?
Genuine happiness also pertains to contentment. When you are contented with the job you have, the way you look, with your family, your friends, the place you live in, your car, and all the things you now have.
I believe that life is about finding out about Purpose, right and wrong, trying and failing, winning and loosing. Failure, in a person’s life has become as abundant and necessary as air. But this should not hinder us from becoming genuinely joyful/happy.
How to be genuinely happy in spite of all these? I tell you… every time you exert effort to improve the quality of your life and your being, whether it is cleaning up your room, helping a friend, taking care of your sick dog, fail on board exams and trying again, life gives you equivalent points for that.
Imagine life as a big score board like those which are used in the NFLs. Every time you take a step forward, you make scoring points. Wouldn’t it be nice to look at that board at the end of each game and think to yourself “Whew! I got a point today. I’m glad I gave it a shot.”, instead of looking at it all blank and murmur “Geez, I didn’t even hit a score today. I wish I had the guts to try out. We could have won!” and then walk away.
I will conclude this discuss in my next post.
So, how does one become genuinely happy? Step 1 is to love yourself.
My theology professor once said that “loving means accepting.” To love oneself means, not only to accept that you are not a perfect being, but that in that imperfection lies some God-given abilities to make something good out of your life.
However, loving yourself and discovering those abilities are not always possible without a heartfelt relationship with Jesus. He made you, He knows you best and He put all those abilities in you in the first place. Who better to make you love yourself than the One that made you?
Genuine happiness also pertains to contentment. When you are contented with the job you have, the way you look, with your family, your friends, the place you live in, your car, and all the things you now have.
I believe that life is about finding out about Purpose, right and wrong, trying and failing, winning and loosing. Failure, in a person’s life has become as abundant and necessary as air. But this should not hinder us from becoming genuinely joyful/happy.
How to be genuinely happy in spite of all these? I tell you… every time you exert effort to improve the quality of your life and your being, whether it is cleaning up your room, helping a friend, taking care of your sick dog, fail on board exams and trying again, life gives you equivalent points for that.
Imagine life as a big score board like those which are used in the NFLs. Every time you take a step forward, you make scoring points. Wouldn’t it be nice to look at that board at the end of each game and think to yourself “Whew! I got a point today. I’m glad I gave it a shot.”, instead of looking at it all blank and murmur “Geez, I didn’t even hit a score today. I wish I had the guts to try out. We could have won!” and then walk away.
I will conclude this discuss in my next post.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Joyful as You Want to Be
Its been a long time since posted last, I mean like months!! You know, this wasn’t what I planned when I started blogging.
The truth is that I have had a very busy and hard year. Dealt with the death of my grandfather, several failed attempts at starting up another business and a couple of other things. All these got me side tracked and not to mention depressed and sometime discouraged.
But I have decided to not allow whatever has happened affect my blog any longer. I mean, after all the byline of my blog is DEALING WITH LIFE’S ISSUES. So I intend to share with you, my readers, all that I have learnt. I will do my best not to be absent for such a long time again.
And talking about my experiences, I have come to settle it that JOY/HAPPINESS is a decision!! Almost everyone have heard the hit single 'Don't Worry, Be Happy' by Bobby McFerrin. The song has a very catchy way of conveying its message of being happy to everyone. Bobby McFerrin’s simple message surely made a lot of people happy by telling them not to worry.
Living a happy, resilient and optimistic life is wonderful, and is also good for your health. Being happy actually protects you from the stresses of life. Stress is linked to top causes of death such as heart disease, cancer and stroke.
One of the better things ever said is - 'The only thing in life that will always remain the same is change', and in our life we have the power to make the necessary changes if we want to. Even if we find ourselves in an unbearable situation we can always find solace in the knowledge that it too would change. Joy/Happiness is not an external thing, it is internal. If you are not joyful inside, you cannot really be happy.
Any joy that is externally stimulated will never last because as soon as the source changes for whatever reason, you loose your joy. Joy that comes from inside lasts as it is not dependent on external stimuli. And this joy, the REAL and only true JOY comes only from a true relationship with Jesus Christ (John 15: 11). Social networks or relationships are also essential to happiness.
People are different, accept people for whom or what they are, avoid clashes, constant arguments, and let go of all kinds of resentments. If arguments seem unavoidable still try and make an effort to understand the situation and you might just get along well with them. Happiness is actually found in everyone, increasing it is a way to make your life more wonderful and also healthier. To be joyful is relatively easy; just decide to be a joyful person. Abraham Lincoln observed that most people for most of the time can choose how happy or stressed, how relaxed or troubled, how bright or dull their outlook will be. The choice is simple really, choose to be happy.
There are several ways by which you can do this.
Being grateful is a great attitude. We have so much to be thankful for. Thank the taxi driver for bringing you home safely, thank the cook for a wonderful dinner and thank the guy who cleans your windows. Also thank the mailman for bringing you your mails, thank the policeman for making your place safe and thank God for being alive ‘cos if you were not, all the others won’t matter.
News is stressful. Get less of it. Some people just can't start their day without their daily dose of news. Try and think about it, 99% of the news we hear or read is bad news. Starting the day with bad news does not seem to be a sensible thing to do.
A religious connection is also recommended. Being part of a religious group with its singing, sacraments, prayers and meditations foster inner peace.
Manage your time. Time is invaluable and too important to waste. Time management can be viewed as a list of rules that involves scheduling, setting goals, planning, creating lists of things to do and prioritizing. These are the core basics of time management that should be understood to develop an efficient personal time management skill. These basic skills can be fine tuned further to include the finer points of each skill that can give you that extra reserve to make the results you desire.
Laugh and laugh heartily everyday. Heard a good joke? Tell your friends or family about it. As they also say -'Laughter is the best medicine'.
Express your feelings, affections, friendship and passion to people around you. They will most likely reciprocate your actions. Try not to keep pent up anger or frustrations, this is bad for your health. Instead find ways of expressing them in a way that will not cause more injury or hurt to anyone.
Working hard brings tremendous personal satisfaction. It gives a feeling of being competent in finishing our tasks. Accomplishments are necessary for all of us; they give us a sense of value. Work on things that you feel worthy of your time.
Learning is a joyful exercise. Try and learn something new everyday. Learning also makes us expand and broaden our horizons. And could also give us more opportunities in the future.
Run, jog, walk and do other things that your body was made for. Feel alive. Avoid exposure to negative elements like loud noises, toxins and hazardous places. These are the few simple things you can do everyday to be happy.
And always remember the quote from Abraham Lincoln, he says that, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
The truth is that I have had a very busy and hard year. Dealt with the death of my grandfather, several failed attempts at starting up another business and a couple of other things. All these got me side tracked and not to mention depressed and sometime discouraged.
But I have decided to not allow whatever has happened affect my blog any longer. I mean, after all the byline of my blog is DEALING WITH LIFE’S ISSUES. So I intend to share with you, my readers, all that I have learnt. I will do my best not to be absent for such a long time again.
And talking about my experiences, I have come to settle it that JOY/HAPPINESS is a decision!! Almost everyone have heard the hit single 'Don't Worry, Be Happy' by Bobby McFerrin. The song has a very catchy way of conveying its message of being happy to everyone. Bobby McFerrin’s simple message surely made a lot of people happy by telling them not to worry.
Living a happy, resilient and optimistic life is wonderful, and is also good for your health. Being happy actually protects you from the stresses of life. Stress is linked to top causes of death such as heart disease, cancer and stroke.
One of the better things ever said is - 'The only thing in life that will always remain the same is change', and in our life we have the power to make the necessary changes if we want to. Even if we find ourselves in an unbearable situation we can always find solace in the knowledge that it too would change. Joy/Happiness is not an external thing, it is internal. If you are not joyful inside, you cannot really be happy.
Any joy that is externally stimulated will never last because as soon as the source changes for whatever reason, you loose your joy. Joy that comes from inside lasts as it is not dependent on external stimuli. And this joy, the REAL and only true JOY comes only from a true relationship with Jesus Christ (John 15: 11). Social networks or relationships are also essential to happiness.
People are different, accept people for whom or what they are, avoid clashes, constant arguments, and let go of all kinds of resentments. If arguments seem unavoidable still try and make an effort to understand the situation and you might just get along well with them. Happiness is actually found in everyone, increasing it is a way to make your life more wonderful and also healthier. To be joyful is relatively easy; just decide to be a joyful person. Abraham Lincoln observed that most people for most of the time can choose how happy or stressed, how relaxed or troubled, how bright or dull their outlook will be. The choice is simple really, choose to be happy.
There are several ways by which you can do this.
Being grateful is a great attitude. We have so much to be thankful for. Thank the taxi driver for bringing you home safely, thank the cook for a wonderful dinner and thank the guy who cleans your windows. Also thank the mailman for bringing you your mails, thank the policeman for making your place safe and thank God for being alive ‘cos if you were not, all the others won’t matter.
News is stressful. Get less of it. Some people just can't start their day without their daily dose of news. Try and think about it, 99% of the news we hear or read is bad news. Starting the day with bad news does not seem to be a sensible thing to do.
A religious connection is also recommended. Being part of a religious group with its singing, sacraments, prayers and meditations foster inner peace.
Manage your time. Time is invaluable and too important to waste. Time management can be viewed as a list of rules that involves scheduling, setting goals, planning, creating lists of things to do and prioritizing. These are the core basics of time management that should be understood to develop an efficient personal time management skill. These basic skills can be fine tuned further to include the finer points of each skill that can give you that extra reserve to make the results you desire.
Laugh and laugh heartily everyday. Heard a good joke? Tell your friends or family about it. As they also say -'Laughter is the best medicine'.
Express your feelings, affections, friendship and passion to people around you. They will most likely reciprocate your actions. Try not to keep pent up anger or frustrations, this is bad for your health. Instead find ways of expressing them in a way that will not cause more injury or hurt to anyone.
Working hard brings tremendous personal satisfaction. It gives a feeling of being competent in finishing our tasks. Accomplishments are necessary for all of us; they give us a sense of value. Work on things that you feel worthy of your time.
Learning is a joyful exercise. Try and learn something new everyday. Learning also makes us expand and broaden our horizons. And could also give us more opportunities in the future.
Run, jog, walk and do other things that your body was made for. Feel alive. Avoid exposure to negative elements like loud noises, toxins and hazardous places. These are the few simple things you can do everyday to be happy.
And always remember the quote from Abraham Lincoln, he says that, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
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